Average Life , Amazing Memories
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If you ever get sad, remember that there’s a mash-up of “Under the Sea” and “Ms. New Booty.”
(via laughbitches)
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I think the weirdest thing is that the person you’re going to marry and spend the rest of your life together with is currently walking the earth, living their own life, going to school or going to work or whatever, doing all these things and making all these memories that you’ll get to hear about from them years from now.
(via laughbitches)
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And that’s when you knew London wasn’t a complete ditz.
what if she was just witch and she just didn’t understand the muggle world
That explains why we never saw her parents… they were probably too busy with their jobs in the Ministry… 0_o
LONDON’S A SQUIB
BUT WAT IF SHE WASN’T
WAT IF SHE ACTUALLY HAD POWERS BUT HID THEM
GRADUATED FROM HOGWARTS EARLY
AND INTERNED IN OUR WORLD BECAUSE SHE WANTED TO WORK WITH MUGGLES
IT WOULD EXPLAIN WHY SHE FOUND IT DIFFICULT TO USE SO MANY MUNDANE MUGGLE OBJECTS
(via laughbitches)
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You’ve been playing with fire, mother. Prepare to get B U R N E D
I’VE BEEN LAUGHING FOR 10000 YEARS
Update: My mum came home. It’s a good thing I did this in the bathroom because she nearly peed herself when she saw it. After she finished laughing she turned to me with this dead serious expression and whispered
“This means war”
and silently walked out of the room
Guys I’m scared shitless I think my mum is gonna kill me in my sleep
UPDATE: I WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND MY COMPUTER BACKGROUND WAS CHANGED TO THIS
WITH A STICKY NOTE ON THE KEY BOARD THAT SAYS
“I am the oncoming storm”
HELP
PARENTING DONE RIGHT
CAN WE PLEASE TRADE PARENTS OR SOMETHING
(via laughbitches)
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spelling bee moderator: contestant 142, your word is “fergalicious”
contestant: *looks around nervously* um… could i please have a definition?
moderator: *flips through dictionary* “fergalicious. definition: make them boys go loco.”
(via laughbitches)
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When a guy calls you hot, .... When a guy calls you hot, he’s looking at your body. When a guy calls you pretty, he’s looking at your face. When a guy calls you beautiful he’s looking at your heart. All three guys still wanna fuck you though.
My lovely followers, please follow this blog immediately!
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#safetytipsforladies: A hashtag about how tired women are of being told to do stupid, ineffective, unrealistic things to avoid being raped.
(via the-parachutes-went-off)
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if you just walked into a club and the floor was super slippery and people had strapped knives to their feet and were jumping around you’d be like “holy shit, i don’t know if this is the environment for me” and yet skating is a thing
(via laughbitches)
